This morning I woke up, took out my organic milk out of the fridge, pulled out my fiber enriched Kashi cereal and grabbed some non-organic, pesticide filled raspberries out of the fridge. I poured the cereal and milk into a bowl and then threw the raspberries into the cereal. All of a sudden I remembered I hadn't washed the berries and stood there staring into the bowl for a little while, wondering if I should fish them out. Finally, I decided that a few pesticides won't kill me and ate it anyway.

I will never spend $6.99 on organic milk ever again.

Ok, I almost forgot my password into Blogger. Last night, The Rockers invited me out to dinner at La Bella Bistecca in Forest Park (absolutely delicious & worth the trip out here, btw) and had a blogging intervention with me. So, over some wine and lobster creole bisque soup I agreed I would make a bigger effort to come back. Last weekend, I was in Lake Geneva, WI, with my parents and had a bit of an intervention with them, as well, in the fact that I told them they need to stop reading this. I can't write honestly when the people who yelled at me to clean my room for 15 years are all up in my biz. AND I KNOW IF YOU ARE. And before you all, "Aw, poor Megan's parents. How did they get such an ungrateful ingrate for a daughter?" I can assure you we have a strong enough relationship that I don't really feel they need to have access to this, too. So let's roll.

Hello internets. I wish I could say that I haven't been ignoring you, but...I've been ignoring you. You stopped working out, gained all this weight and I just can't take looking at the hair on your back anymore. Seriously, I can braid that shit.

Okay, truth be told, I just felt like I was tellin' the same story, different day for 4 (5?) years and it got to be a little old. I was sick of hearing myself, felt like I wasn't givin' you something worth comin' back for, so I quit all together. Which was a little selfish and lame of me, but whatever. We'll work through it.

So, I'm working on a recap of the past two months, but since you're all bangin' down my door to be entertained (seriously, there's no more porn on the internet to see?), here's one of my favorite Paul F. Tompkins stand up pieces. Enjoy.