Tonight while waiting for the El at the Clark & Lake platform, I saw the most gorgeous male specimen I have seen in a long time. Granted, he was wearing flip flops while also wearing a suit coat, but maybe he just got here from California where that sort of thing is acceptable, so I let it slide. And then he turned and looked at me. Eye contact was made! And then he looked down at my bag. And then I looked down and noticed I was holding onto a bag of cat food. Of all the fucking things to be holding onto, nothing screams, "I'm single and appear desperate" like holding onto a fucking bag of Meow Mix.

HOPE YOU ENJOY IT, WALLY.

I won 1/250,000,000 of the MegaMillions lotto today. Which I have to split 12 ways with my office pool.

Dang.

See the horror for yourself. Mike, Mr. Illinois, thank you for finding this gem.

Tonight I was walking home from the El, minding my own business, listening to my iPod. As I was in my alleyway by the dumpsters of my apartment, a guy was walking toward me. He stopped and it appeared as if he was talking to me. Seeing as I had the music on kind of loud, I took one ear bud out and said, "I'm sorry, what?" The dude, who I would categorize as "half-special," says to me, "I see you walking every morning. It looked like you twisted your ankle the other day, you were limping."

For the record, I may have twisted my ankle (I hate these shoes that I insist on wearing everyday) but in no way was I "limping." I honestly think that's just how I walk? I prefer to think of it as my signature strut, but now I'm all paranoid that it looks like I'm limping when I'm walking perfectly fine. Do I? Anyway. Back to the story.

So I half laugh and say, "Oh, I might have twisted my ankle. But I'm okay now." The guy says, "Yeah, I see you every day now, you really put a smile on my face." Nervously, I laugh, "Oh, that's nice of you to say. Okay, now. Have a good night." He interupts my last sentence and says, "The next time I see you, I should say "hi." I say, "Okay...sounds good. Good night now!" And then as I'm walking away he half-shouts at me, "You have the face of an angel! You really put a smile on my face!"

I really have to stop walking in the alley.

Um, did anyone happen to be watch Miss Teen USA on NBC tonight? I doubt it, since you all have lives, but I just happened to catch about a 1/2 hour of it and watched the HORROR. First, there is a giant sign hanging above the stage that just says, "OMG!" Really, NBC? Really?

Secondly, Miss South Carolina's interview question was, "Recent polls have shown that 1/5 of Americans can't locate the U.S. on a world map. Why do you think this is?" Her response (and I can't make this shit up), "I personally believe...that...U.S. Americans are unable to do so because, uh, some-uh! people out there in our nation don't *have* maps, and I believe that our education like, such as, in South Africa and the Iraq, everywhere like, such as, and, I believe that they should...our education over here in the U.S. should help the U.S., oh, er, should help South Africa and should help the Iraq and the Asian countries, so we will be able to build up our future...for our children."

You have no idea how painful that was to rewind back and forth so I could write all of that verbatim. It didn't even make sense. U.S. Americans? The Iraq? Darlin', the U.S. Americans are now, in fact, dumber for listening and reading to your rambling rant. It did not help our future...for our children. Moving on.

And lastly, Miss North Carolina was asked (by Judge #2, Joey Lawrence, by the way), "What was the biggest risk you've ever taken in your life and what have you learned from that experience?" and her response was (and I'm not joking), "I have to say the biggest risk I've ever taken was when I went to Canada and I went snowboarding. Um, it's not like the mountains of North Carolina at all...it's pretty uh, hard work." So let me get this straight. Going on vacation...with your rich parents...was the riskiest thing you've ever done. Life's hard, Miss North Carolina. Waaaaaaah!!!!

Seriously, could she play the role any better?

Just another reason why AMC's "Mad Men" is brilliant: I love the little Mad Men factoids before the commercial begins. It actually gets me to stop to read it before fast forwarding to the next ad. And by the time TiVo figures out where to stop, I've probably have seen between 1/3 to 2/3 of the 30 sec. spot anyway. Very smart.

Yesterday I was lucky enough to spend up in the mountains of Colorado playing golf at Castle Pines. Saying it was absolutely gorgeous would be an understatement. I joked with someone that this course made me feel like I was actually transported into a video game version of "Golden Tee." I'll upload a few photos a little later on.

I beat out 120 golfers to win "longest putt," and beat all of the women golfers to also win "longest drive." Considering I play only about 3 times a year, I surprised myself. Our caddies told me that I out drove my closest competition by about 100+ yards. I took home 2 of the day's 5 awards in the tournament, which audibly surprised a few people when they found out a girl won twice.

Walking up in front of the audience to pick up my prize money, I must admit, I felt pretty bad ass. I might actually have to pick this game up.

Wishing I was home right now.

I found out today through Denver locals that the golf course I'm playing on Monday, Castle Pines, is private and costs $100K to join. Apparently, the guy who owns the realtor company Remax tried to join this course and was denied. So, he built the largest home on the property overlooking the course and then built his own 18 hole golf course just as quaint little a "fuck you" to the course. Rich people are funny. I'm looking forward to playing it, even though part of me is wondering what the hell I'm doing there.

The other night I was leaving work late and heading to the El when I came upon what was clearly a movie set - giant lights, trucks holding equiptment, etc. When I got to the corner, I was stopped by some scrawny guy with a badge around his neck and a walkie talkie in his hand. He told me that I would have to "go around because we're filming here." For those who don't know, Angelina Jolie is in town filming her 2008 movie "Wanted" here, and Chicagoans are going nuts (in a positive way) because of it. Not me, though. Angelina be fuckin' up my commute, yo.

I'm in Denver through Monday. I'm hoping to drive up to the mountains this weekend at some point. And do what, I don't know, I haven't thought that far ahead yet. In the news, don't young women who just 'go out for a drive in the mountains' inevitably get attacked by a bear or stabbed by some crazy mountain man?

I might just hang out by the hotel pool, too.

So, last night I wrote a post about MTV's "The Hills" Season 3 premiere, realized how embarrassing that is, and then deleted it. I decided I'm bringin' it back because I can't deny my love for this truly terrible show. Terribly AWESOME, that is! Who's with me?! Who else saw Spencer propose to newly fake boob implanted Heidi with a rumored $770 lab engineered diamond engagement ring?

If none of you bitches watched this show, I swear to god. Jeff, you hush.

I went out with the guy who kinda smells like an old man again recently. I know, I know. But I didn't notice the cologne so much after about 5 gin and tonics. Just kidding. No, I'm not. About 30 minutes into the date and realizing we have nothing really to say to one another (long, uncomfortable pauses), I told him that I thought he was a nice guy (he really is), but that I noticed that we don't talk all that much and asked how he felt about the whole thing. The worst part is, he didn't think anything was wrong, and just said he can be quiet sometimes. But there's a big difference between enjoying the silence in someone's company and being completely bored. Moving on...

I'm heading out to Denver Thurs - Monday. I'm hoping to see a few of my friends who live out there during the weekend portion of the trip. One of my good friends from high school, Jayme, just had a little baby so I'll get to meet her little girl for the first time. Yay! I was also invited to play golf in a tournament for free out there with on Monday, which is hilarious to me. I guess I should practice a little before Monday. It'll be fun...there's a chance to win a plasma TV (amongst other things), so I pretty much *have* to play. Mama's got a new place to furnish!

The sluttiest of all bread manufacturers, Bimbo.

Wish list item for my new place #5,673



Limited edition David Bowie dinner plates by Paul Smith.

The plastic bag situation at my local Wal-Mart is out of control. I know I should have said something to stop the cashier from double bagging everything, but part of me was in awe about how much further she would go. The kicker was when she put my toothpaste into a separate bag from the rest of my items. Images of landfills full of seagulls and plastic bags cascading down a mountain of trash occupied my mind throughout the entire checkout process. I walked in for a couple of household items and walked out with a guilty conscience. It's time to invest into some cheap canvas bags.

Sometimes I wish a trip to Wal-Mart was just a stupid trip to Wal-Mart. Way to over-think everything, Megs. Bravo.

Last night, I went to see the Old 97s with my friend and co-worker, Lori. I had never heard of their music before, but had heard about their hot lead singer, Rhett Miller, so I was game. I am told Rhett is 40 years old, but he doesn't look much older than 26, in my opinion. He does this little rocking back and forth Elvis-ish move that sends me a flutter. I said, a'flutt-ah!



:: insert girly shrieking here ::

Just as I was trying to remember where I had read about the Old 97s, guess who walked up and said hi.



None other than the funniest girl in blogging, Ms. Tequila Red and her beau, Josh. A good time was had by all, despite it being 114 gazbillion degrees outside. Was that global warming or just Rhett's hotness radiating onto the crowd? Go on and strut, Rhett!

The contract has been signed! Carpet and paint has been picked! A congratulatory toast was made with my realtor over sake and sushi. I am scared out of my mind, but satisfied and content at the same time. This is good.

Okay, so NOW I know what everyone is talking about when they say buying a place is incredibly stressful.

The entire deal was hanging by a thread last night, but everything's been cleared up and we're back on course. I have tried to remain just positive through the last 24 iffy hours and just imagined myself living there already. I realize this might just sound like a bunch of voodoo crap, but so far, it seems to be working.

Tomorrow, I sign the contract, pick out carpeting and paint colors! I'll be feverishly flipping through Domino magazines tonight if you need me. I'm so excited for this and can't wait for my first housewarming party.

Bob called me and asked if I wanted to go to Lollapalooza on Sunday. I rarely ever see the guy anymore, so whenever we hang out, I'm happy and excited to see him. Inevitably, he has to go and do something stupid within the first 5 minutes of hanging out. Most of the time, I know he's doing it on purpose and it cracks me up. This is one of those times. He stands there, looks around at the crowd and says, "You know, your generation is just a bunch of poseurs." I asked him when did he get to be such a curmudgeon, fanned him off from the heat, and asked if he forgot his angina medication again.

Sunday was the best day to go (in my opinion). We saw Amy Winehouse (who, surprisingly, actually showed up and seemed sober), Iggy Pop and The Stooges (the best!), Modest Mouse, a little of TV on the Radio and finally, Pearl Jam who closed the 3 day festival. I took some photos, and if I can figure out how to post it from my new camera, I have a video clip of Iggy singing "1969."

Iggy says, "Heeeeey!"



This guy is 60 years old, people. Dare I say he looks pretty healthy when he's not on the junk. As a side note, someone in the crowd held up a teeny tiny "Detroit sucks" sign, which cracked me up.



Iggy shows us the importance of staying hydrated.



And then...Iggy invited all the poseurs :: glares at Bob :: on stage. Sometimes it's hard to argue with the man.





By far, The Stooges had the best show that I saw all day there.



To quote Iggy, "My Idea of Fun (is killing everyone!)"

I think I found a place I want to buy!!!!

"Mad Men" on AMC is by far the BEST show on TV right now, in my opinion. Thank GOD I didn't work in this industry in the 60s. I heard enough stories just likes these happened up to the early 90s, so I don't think this is so far from the truth. As a side note, my friend, Paul, has the "Lemon" VW ad they featured tonight blown up in a large print in his living room.

I'm not much of a "drama" fan, but this show is worth at least TiVoing. FUCK! So so good.

I was invited to 3 Cubs games this week, but can only make 1 of the games (which is tomorrow, with my entire company). Either tickets were really easy to come by this week, or the baseball gods weren't planning very well. I'll be at work again late tonight (in order to be able to go to the game tomorrow) if you need to reach me. I don't even really like baseball. But I like beer.